Brandon Phillips

Building Blocks of Character

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12 Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.

1 Timothy 4:12

Lego! A timeless toy that any kids and adults at any ages can enjoy. I especially love the Star Wars ships although they cost too much!

If someone gives me a new Lego brand new in the box and I have instructions it is no problem for me to knock out this task in a couple of hours. If someone gives me a used set with no instructions, then it becomes more difficult and almost impossible to finish the set as originally intended.

Life is like that too. When expectations are not clear it can be very frustrating to try and meet those expectations. When you start school your teachers give homework assignments and tests to study for. You know the expectation so you can meet them.

There are a set of expectations in the Bible that God has set for us. Some of these expectation are wired into our morality but they can seem hard to attain. But I have good news for you that God has given us instructions for these building blocks of character.

In 1 Timothy Paul, inspired by God is writing to his young friend in ministry. He is writing to encourage him in living the Christian life, which we all need encouragement and support with from time to time.

To keep this brief… are you living TALL are setting examples in these areas to your family, friends, and acquaintances.

  • Talk (Speech) - How you talk about God, family, friends, and your quality of speech
  • Act (Conduct) - How you act are you a light for Jesus? Are you kind and helpful?
  • Live (Faith) - Do you know Jesus, think about Him, talk about him with others?
  • Love (Purity) - Are you seeking to please God and be a good example in moral areas of life.

So ask yourself these questions?

Am I a TALL example for the Lord?

Who can I get to hold be accountable to be a TALL example for the Lord?

Parents are you being a good example of this to your family?

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Peace

Peace

Why?

  1. Peace is available at all times.
  2. Peace is a by product of the holy spirit in our lives.
  3. We are called to be at peace.

How?

  • Go to God in prayer with thanksgiving.

When we focus on our problems they will dominate our thoughts and the worry, stress, and anxiety can overwhelm us. This is the common approach to our busy days. We can chose to focus on God and the good things he has for us and when we do we have the peace of God to guard our hearts.

  • Focus on the good things.

In his book winning the war in your mind, Craig Grochel says "Your life is moving in the direction of your strongest thoughts." It is so true! Have you ever found your self mad because of the smallest thing yet for some reason you keep focusing on it only to realize it wasn’t that big of a deal. When you finally stopped thinking about it and focused your thoughts on something else that attitude went away.

Practice trying these two things in the midst of even your busiest moments and feel the peace of God wash over you.

Blessings

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Busyness is overrated. I am not sure when we began to feel like we had to be busy all the time. As if every minute of everyday had to be planned and we had to be rushing through the day just trying to get to the next thing.

As is the case with most people the frantic pace of the current season of my life has made my blood pressure rise and my stress multiply. It is not that I want this it is just the reality of being a busy family. But the question I want to ask myself is what can I do about it?

This morning as I was rushing from home to get the kids dropped off at school and to my next appointment I realized I forgot to take my meds. I had to go back home and this was going to put me more behind. I went inside took my meds and then a feeling of peace came over me as I sat in the drivers seat about to set off again. I closed my eyes and voiced a prayer of thanksgiving and I no longer felt the stress or anxiety.

Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

Finding the time, when you can’t find the time.

Finding the time when you can’t find the time

When it was day, he went out and made his way to a deserted place. But the crowds were searching for him. They came to him and tried to keep him from leaving them.

Luke 4:42

Going a little farther, he fell facedown and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.”

Matthew 26:39

Like most people, at the end of a busy day I feel tired, overwhelmed, and on edge. I arrive at home and try to hold it together to give the family ”something”. There is homework, dinner, and other night time activities to be done. Then finally when its all done I can catch my breath.

In my home it is In the stillness of the morning I can see things more clearly. After a good night’s sleep I get up and spend time in prayer, Scripture, and solitude, with coffee. God refreshes my soul and I can do it all over again.

It might seem that during seasons of life, when time is hard to come by, that spending time in stillness and mediating on scripture and God is counter productive. But those who take the time to do this realize how important it is. There is no substitute in the Christian life for the Word of God. But where do we ”find time” when we can’t “find time”.

Stay up late

For some this is impossible you can’t keep you eyes open any longer. Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is just go to bed. However, sometimes it is choosing to not watch another episode and instead read the Bible or another Christian book before bed. This could help you wind down and put your mind focused on the things of God at the end of the day.

Get up early

When you live in a house like mine with 4 kids the only time of peace and quiet is when they are in bed. I get up early before anyone else is up, except my wife, to make sure I get some quality time in the Lord. I read scripture, other Christian books, and pray. The coffee helps sharpen my mind for understanding in the dark hours of the morning.

I understand that this is not for everyone and at times it is impossible for me as well. But this is a discipline that I have added to my life years ago and has shown lasting fruit in my life. When I consistently do this I am more spirit-filled, patient, and see God’s opportunities in my life. I am also more pleasant to be around.

Take advantage of idle times

People find themselves waiting often. Whether for a meeting, doctors appointment, or in the pick up line at school. What are you doing with that time? Are you scrolling facebook? Is there something more beneficial you could do during that time?

You can take you Bible with you or pull up the Bible app and read scripture from that. There are time when I play solitaire or scroll FB but when I know that I will be waiting I typically will bring the Bible or other Christian book, focused on spiritual growth to leadership.

Use drive time.

I know many of you that are in the car may have people with you and it may not be possible to listen to something in the car. But you can use the drive time as conversation times. Having conversations in the car can help your faith as well. And kids always seem to have the profound questions when we least expect it. Use that time.

If you are able to have some time alone in the car use an app such as Bibleapp, audible, or Scribd to listen to the Bible or other Christian books. You may not be able to comprehend it all but it is a wise use of time. You will be surprised what you pick up by listening to a book or podcast.

It doesn't always happen

All of these instances are what happens on the perfect day. Normally if I try to stay up and read I get through 2 sentences and fall asleep. When I get up early, before the caffeine kicks in a find myself reading the same 2 words over and over. Often when I am waiting I waste my time scrolling FB and getting frustrated by the things I see and read.

When we are intentional we can find the time we need. It will lead to us being more focused on what God wants for our lives and we are able to ignore the fear produced by worldly lies. It will also lead to more opportunities for you to be used by God in someone else’s life, because you are in tune with God working around you.

So don’t give up when you feel overwhelmed. I promise you can find the time when you can’t find the time. Keep your head up, take a deep breath, and invite God and His Spirit in to help you realize the fruit of the Spirit in you.

Biblical Truth At Home

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My passion is to see Biblical truth lived out in the home. In a time when it is politically incorrect to talk about absolute truth, we know that there is one place that we can find it, the Bible, God's Holy Word. Teaching the Bible is not only meant for the professionals, pastors or those who have been to Bible college, it is a command for all of us to teach the Bible and lead our home spiritually. While it may sound overwhelming to there are plenty of tools and methods available.

6 All Scripture is inspired by God and is profitable for teaching, for rebuking, for correcting, for training in righteousness, 17 so that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16

So what are some ways we can teach Biblical truth at home?

16 Let the word of Christ dwell richly among you, in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another through psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:16-17

  • Model it

This will be the first one listed most every time. Actions speak louder than words. When you learn Biblical truths and live them out at home, others will learn by your example. This will be the most important way to teach faith to your household.

  • Intentional Time

When we set aside time to teach the word in our homes it shows priority to those in your home. When you open the Bible together something special happens and your family is brought closer together. It may be a challenge at first depending on your schedule, the age of your kids, and other factors but it is worth it in the end. You will be setting a Biblical foundation so those in your home will be able to wade through the lies of the world, because they know the truth.

  • Weave it into your daily conversations 

Worship and spiritual things are not something that should just be done at certain times of the day, the Christian life is a lifestyle and should be included in EVERYTHING you do. As you go through your day and you encounter frustration, talk about how God gives you patience and peace in the midst. When someone treats your kids wrong and they are sad remind them that they are a child of God and He loves them enough to send His Son for them.

As you grow in the Lord you will be able to see how God is involved in every aspect of your life and you will be able to weave the gospel, Christ, the Bible, and spiritual things into daily conversations in the car and around the house.

Tools you can use:

An app that has bible translations and devotional plans sent right to your phone!

  • Family Devotional

Many options available for this. The scripture above mentions a few things that should be included.

Psalms, hymns, spiritual songs, and gratitude. We can translate that to scripture, prayer, declarations of biblical truth, and singing.

Books on the subject

Habits of the households

The New City Catechism

Mama Bear Apologetics

  • Church resources

A Practical Guide to Family Worship - Discipleship class coming in the Fall. Here is a trailer

Small Groups for parents.

Family Worship: Habits That Shape The Home

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Family Worship: Habits That Help Shape Our Home

Continuing on with our discussion of family worship, I want to focus on the habits that will help shape our homes.

First I acknowledge that every family is different and your rhythm will not look the same. But I also want to say that a good habit or practice is good because its good, even if you can't use it in your schedule. SO we will just name a few and if you can use them great! If not find what works for you and your family.

We are a BUSY family of 6 with 3 teens, I know that my time is spent differently than a family of 4 with littles not involved in school or extra curriculars. The reality is during some seasons of life your time will be limited. Take advantage of the time you do have.

4 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.[a] 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. 7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol[b] on your forehead.[c] 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your city gates. Deuteronomy 6:4-9

Three Habits to Form

Scripture Reading

Our goal is to make little worshipers who will know, obey, and love God. When we read scripture together we are able to hear the great love story that is contained with in. We also get to know the God of the Bible who sent His Son Jesus to be our Savior! If our kids can grasp that they cannot help but worship.

Discussions

Our live are to be about God. He is included in our every decision of life. It makes sense then that He will be talked about in our homes on a daily basis. When a question comes up we must first ask what does God say? When we constantly turn our attention to God we will see a change in our home and the desires we all have to put Him first.

Prayer

Jesus gave us a great example in that we need to pray and have constant communication with God. As we make this a habit our kids will also know how to pray. When we set the example and they see a passionate prayer life they will desire the same.

Singing

Whether you can "sing" or not most people would agree that there is something special about music. When we lift our voices there is a special connection with God. Our hearts are open and stirred and we are ready to hear from him.

How do we make sure we put these practices into place? It come down to a decision to be intentional.

Decide on a time

Just like adding a practice or a performance on the family calendar, pick a time and put it on the calendar. It is more likely to take place if it is on your calendar. Obviously there are a lot of things to consider when doing this. How old are your kids? What nights do you have at home? How long will they be able to handle?

I promise when you plan it and do it, It will be a blessing. Kids are never too young to learn how to worship. You can even start before you have kids! Two equals a family!

Decide on a plan

What are you going to do for family worship? Sing? Read? Pray? Dance?

Jot down a plan so that you can feel prepared. It does not have to be anything special but if you have a plan this will help you accomplish your goal. I recommend starting out small, just a short passage and prayer.

Decide don't slide

It's also super important to make sure that you make the decision and stick with it. When you decide you don't slide. When you make a plan you will be more likely to follow through than if you don't. So this one is really a matter of perseverance there's gonna be times when you're tired and it's hard to get everybody motivated to do family worship but the benefits outweigh the pain. And before you know it this will be a time that your family looks forward to when you can all worship together and since God's presence

Worship Leads To Change

Last week we talked about family worship. It is clear to see in scripture that this is not a new concept or new practice. It is a time tested practice that produces disciples with in the context of the family!

If you are looking for a way to make sure your family is following God, family worship is not  a magic bullet but I would say that the chances are good  of them following through on their faith, when they have an example to follow. All throughout scripture we see the examples and we are encouraged to imitate them. 

I urge you then be imitators of me. 1 Corinthian 4:16

Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ. 1 Corinthians 11:1

Brother's join in imitating me, keeping your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us. Philippians 3:17

What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me  practice these thing, and the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:9 

This command is of vital importance! The spiritual leader of the family has to imitate Christ so the ones that you shepherd will have an example to follow. They are going to follow our example, are you setting a good one?

The example you set, the way you worship, will lead to something. I believe it should be the following.

  • Heart change - Who we are.

We are born into this world with a sin-sickness. The only way to change that is to change our affections to things of God. As we worship him our perspective changes. Our identity changes. We go from lost to found.

 

3 He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, 14 in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. Colossians 1:13-14

  • Attitude change - How we think.

We are often full of pride and selfishness thinking "what's best for me?" When Christ comes in and we truly encounter Him every changes! Maybe not immediately but eventually.

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Colossians 3:2

  • Behavior change  -How we act.

What good is transformation if you don't live it out. The process of spiritual transformation leads to a change in behavior. Not for salvation but because of salvation, it is the fruit of a changed life.

And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6

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Family Worship

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Not long ago I created a team at church. This team will help me plan family ministry and offer suggestions and support as we move forward as a church to a more intergenerational church family approach to ministry. At that meeting we acknowledged that this would be a long process. The shift does not happen overnight but I believe the effort and time it will take is worth it! What are some shifts we can make in our own families? Let's look at one today… Family worship.

12 Assemble the people, men, women, and little ones, and the sojourner within your towns, that they may hear and learn to fear the Lord your God, and be careful to do all the words of this law, 13 and that their children, who have not known it, may hear and learn to fear the Lord your God, as long as you live in the land that you are going over the Jordan to possess.” Deut 31:12-13

As we read scripture we can clearly see that discipleship should take place in the context of an intergenerational family. The church is meant to a help in the process, but the main responsibility is ours, as parents. There is no greater privilege.

Here are three things that family worship does for me:

  • Refreshes my soul.

When I gather with my family after the initial groans and hesitation, they usually do settle down and engage. The word of God is powerful and has a way of refreshing the soul. With more frequency the groans will stop, maybe.

  • Strengthens my faith.

I know I am called to this. When I am courageous enough to work through the business and sometimes inconvenience it feels like I am stronger for it. Consistent time of family worship makes me stronger.

  • Ignites my passion for spiritual leadership.

When I see my "little flock" submitting to my leadership it gives me confidence that I can be the spiritual leader that God has called me to be. It can be work at first but eventually it will turn into a rewarding worship experience.

These are three things family worship does for me. Family worship can take many forms based on your families familiarity with it. As your family grows spiritual it will change. The basic elements of family worship are found in Colossians 3:16.

"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God."

  • Scripture
  • Teaching/encouragement
  • Prayer
  • Singing

PS: We have tried to be consistent with our times of family worship. We have managed to get as many as 3 days in week. Sometimes all are present sometimes a few are out at volleyball or soccer practice. My conviction is that we need to do something! We have done dinner table devotions, car ride conversations, and living room family worship. Do whatever works for your family no age is too young. Start small and be encouraged!

The Example – You

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Last week I posted about having a family mission statement. I enjoyed working on ours with our family. However it cannot be a one time thing that we discuss make a graphic and move on. It needs to be something that you talk about often.

I made a picture and plan to display it where it can be seen. I also mention it during family devotions and our prayer times. It try to reenforce it and practice it consistently.

Today, I want to take this mission statement a step further. From words to actions. It is time to live this out and be the example you want others to follow, especially your kids.

Deuteronomy 6:4-6 is known as the Shema and sets forth the core confession of faith in God. This confession still holds truth for us today, and is what we want to pass on to our children.  It gives a model for what it means to be a true followers of God:

 “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 

  1. Love God - God has to be priority in your life. 
  2. Obey God - God’s word needs to be the guide for your life. 
  3. Know God - your knowledge of God must determine your steps.

This is an example for us to set so others can follow. As a parent this is your main responsibility, to set and example for your children to follow in all areas of life. Socially what does it look like to be a good friend. Emotionally what does it look like to be in control of your emotions. Spiritually what does it look like to follow God on a daily basis.

Developing a Family Mission Statement

PHILLIPS KCRU

“Hear, O Israel:TheLordour God, theLordis one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.  Deuteronomy 6:4-7

and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 2 Timothy 3:15

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ Mark 12:30

Every company has a mission statement. This generally is the "WHY?" behind the company's existence. The company will go to great lengths to make it memorable and share it with the world. As important as this is for companies. I believe it is also just as important for our families.

Does your family have a mission statement?

Families exist, according to the bible, to love, obey, and serve God, see Deuteronomy 6, 2 Tim 3:15, and Mark 12:30. For a family to accomplish this purpose it will need to be intentional at doing things that show it. That's why a mission or purpose statement is important to guide all we do as a family.

A mission statement help you decide what to do and what not to do. If you know your mission and an opportunity come up that is contrary to your mission then you pass on that. In other words it help you focus your family only on activities hat help you accomplish your purpose.

How do you come to a family mission statement?

  1. Gather the family together
  2. Ask everyone to come up with words that describe or words you want to describe your family.
  3. Choose bible passages that support those words or qualities.
  4. Craft a statement that is a biblical picture of what your family wants to strive for.

I say strive for because this is something you and your family can grow towards. When you set expectations and goals to accomplish you have a place to go. When you set those in front of your family it is something you can become. NO family is perfect but have a mission statement helps you move towards a goal together.

Here is what our family came up with a few months ago. I cannot say we always live up to these values but it is something we are striving for. May God grant us favor on this quest.

Phillips KCRU.

Kindness

Compassion

Respectful

Uplifting

As a family we seek to be respectful to our parents and authority, live with compassion, show kindness to all, and show the love of Christ by being uplifting to those around us.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29

I am praying for you and your family and may you find this helpful. Remember we are on a journey together. No one has arrived, It feels good to be on the journey with others.

The Inner War

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There is a battle raging. It is not a physical battle that we can see. It is one that is going on inside of us.

We are all born with a soul at war. The war is between the sin nature that we are born with and the awareness that there is a personal creator who loves us and desires us to live a certain way. We learn more about this as we grow in Christ likeness but it is even there from the start.

There is this great sense that we were made for a greater purpose. That is God and his general revelation to us throughout the world. We see Him at work even if we are unaware. We see him working in the lives of those around us. We see his work in creation. It is there and it is obvious.

18 The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, 19 since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. 20 For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. Romans 1:18-20

So how do we win the war inside?

  1. We seek the things above.

So if you have been raised with Christ, seek the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

Colossians 3:1-2

The way of this world is easy to follow and contrary to what God wants for our lives. As we seek Christ there will be plenty of distractions. We need to make sure we are doing all we can to eliminate those distractions and seek Christ in His word.

  1. We find others who are seeking Christ as well.

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

We were never meant to live this life alone. As Christians God gave us each other to experience life with. We will have trouble in this world. Trouble with our circumstances and trouble with sin. When we have others to share with, we will make each other better as we seek God together.

  1. We publicly worship with other believers.

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11

CHURCH YALL! The church is God's family. As we each individually seek God and worship him it is also important to share what God is doing in our lives with other believers. We gather for corporate worship to give God glory and celebrate what he is doing. The more we focus on him the more we see what he is doing. As we gather and share what God is doing we encourage other believers who may be going through a similar situation. We NEED each other.

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